Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize