Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
