Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Randomize