I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
You will never be paid again to get drunk and tell off cops without being arrested. Once in a lifetime opportunity
You're right. Fuck my job. I'm in.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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