I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
She looks like a hot George Washington...I'm going for it
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Randomize
