I understand Curling. That high.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
She even gives head with a lisp.
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize