Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
