I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
A+ Viking dick
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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