redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
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