So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
Could be all of this cough syrup, but I’m ready to fuck 2018 up!
Btw, apparently no one knows who ordered the pizzas for the after party, no one paid, and the delivery lady made a celeb shot, took a beer, then said she'd be back later to finish up the game...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
