i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
I know I swore I wouldn't go home with him, but he whispered that he had taquitos and you know how much drunk me loves taquitos.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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