Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
Getting food poisoning after eating at work was the cherry on top of my "Welcome back to real life" sundae.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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