so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
