we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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