After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Randomize
