Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I thought stuff was gonna go really bad after he filled the super-soaker with kerosene. but it all turned out pretty well.
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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