I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
