Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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