woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
do herpes really smell.
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
he asked if he could put his cape on while he was still inside me.
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
okay when i look at this i can see it on the future news along with the headline "picture scandal involving senatorial candidate sexually harassing drunken idiot in what appears to be a pink room of pain"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
