thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
Dipping chips in queso and thinking of your beautiful face
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
