I need help removing her.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
We're gonna have horrible, horrible babies.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
Mass text: dear whatever jerk off who thinks they stole drugs from me. It was birth control. Go fuck yourself. And pray that I don't get pregnant.
Who puts their birth control in a bottle with a smiley face?!
Oh fuck wait
Randomize
