is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
She even gives head with a lisp.
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
Randomize
