I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Randomize
