After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
Randomize