Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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