i just wanna soil my oats bro
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
