Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
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