roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Randomize
