i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm still hammered too. I started tweeting the time at one point I'm pretty sure.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Wait is this place where the strippers are missing teeth and I think one is missing a thumb? Though I don't know how she would maneuver on the pole without a thumb. Pls advise.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
