Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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