I need help removing her.
That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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