He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize