I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
