i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
the condom got lost in my hair
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I share a birthday weekend with Easter this year, so that fucking sucks. I hate sharing...and I have to share with fucking Jesus this year.\n
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
Randomize
