3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
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