New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
I held a cracker & gaterade down for an hour. I feel like this will be my greatest accomplishment of the day.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
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