How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
