if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I made popcorn. Partly so the room doesn't smell like sex, and partly to apologize for the things you saw when you walked in...
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
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