I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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