is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
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