3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
Randomize
