I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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