If i could tip my vagina, i would.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
I see more hoeing in ur future
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