No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
there is way too much butter on my body for this to be okay
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
I just apologized to a wet floor sign i walked into.
Randomize
