Taylor Swift is so right about you.
where am i from again
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
My mom assumed I was crying because he was leaving. Figured that was better than explaining my eye's sensitivity to semen..
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
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