Taylor Swift is so right about you.
I woke up and went to my kitchen naked and decided I wanted a fruit cup. Ate said fruit cup. Look over and notice my male neighbor is staring at me
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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