If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
He started me on Celexa. I think I feel like Bjork. Is that normal?
Like... my feet feel like little octopuses, and they want to swim to the next room.
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