Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
