So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Divorce is final. Doing tequila shots at 1 in the afternoon.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
We're using joints as your birthday candles
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Randomize
