i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Dude, she told me she wanted to bang my dad. I don't know which is worse, the fact that she wants to or the fact that she told me.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I showed up to a job interview wearing two different shoes. If that's not an omen, I don't know what is.
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
