just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Randomize
