When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
Randomize
