Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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